I'm decorating

I'm thinking I'm gonna put this wallpaper...



In this dining room...


Yes it will make it look smaller and yes it is pretty much black, but is small necessarily bad for a dining room? It's cozy and intimate. It has a sparkly chandelier and I will have a mirror. Below the chair rail I'm gonna do the matching color in paint, but no pattern. Thoughts?
p.s. It goes without saying that the red curtains will be gone, just clearing that up. Also, that is not my dining table or rug. Ha! Yeah right. Mine's better.

Halb halb halb....

Can somebody please email me and remind me to take pictures of the lobster stuff on Sunday? Sugie, if it's you, you can just tell me. That would be helpful. This has become a really boring blog, believe me, I hate it more than you do.
I just had a misunderstanding with someone over ichat (which was not resolved and I am still confused about) but it made me have an idea. Do gay guys date gay girls? Can they? Would they? It sounds perfect kind of, I think. I can't really wrap my head around it but I think it could work. Does anybody want to do an experiment? I would need at least one gay guy and one gay girl, first come first served.
That just made me think of another idea I had in the shower this morning where I have my most interesting ideas. I was thinking of taking my favorite question (what are your 3 favorite foods) and starting to record them and include some backround about the person and make it into a huge study. And maybe I could be in the New Yorker one day or on NPR. It's pretty much my only shot thus far and if it's gonna happen ever I think I better get started on something. What made me think of THAT was that I realized how I haven't yet had one person respond with a dessert item in their top three. I find that interesting, people really seem to love cookies and brownies and ice cream and pie and stuff, so why not? What made me think of THAT was how I have stopped liking sugar stuff.
How are you guys liking this new theme and format of reverse train of thought? More exciting than the alternative (idiotic food babble) right?

Hap(orrified) Homeowner

Hi. I have been packing and house hunting and not cooking at all, I'm sorry if you've missed me. I've barely even been eating at all. I know, sweet. But I have bought a house. If all goes well with the inspections and everything I'll be moving in in a month. There is a pool. And a built in barbecue and outdoor fridge.

The kitchen is not pretty but big and new and very functional and I plan to paint all the cabinets. And by I, I don't mean I. So soon there will probably be magical things coming out of there with a real hot oven and 6 burners and all that.

Maybe I'll even talk about my laundry now that I have brand new front loading copper colored high efficiency machines. They come with the house. As do the plants and the patio furniture and the light fixtures and the window treatments. Who knew? Here's a thing though. Did you ever notice how when you buy a house for say like $500,000 (not what I am doing) you actually pay like a million and a half dollars for it? That's the little stinger they don't tell you about. Ever. I had to use a calculator.

oh and p.s. if anyone wants a Kenmore elite washer and gas dryer that are very clean and functional and were bought about 3 years ago, I am selling them for $400. Maybe you can get a deal because you're my friend. I'm also selling my Kenmore gas grill for $50. And there will be a garage sale on Nov 2 at my old shitty house 4548 Laurelgrove. Tell your friends.

Down and kicked out

I made spaghetti sandwiches the other day. Spaghetti with delicious chunky tomato sauce with onions and garlic and zucchini and mushrooms all on a toasted roll with melted mozzarella on it and parmesan shaved over the top. It was great.
On a less delicious tip, I'm getting kicked out of my perfect little magical dream house and now I just found out single family dwellings do not fall under the rights of renters to get relocation assistance to the tune of $9040. So yeah. Talk about kicking a girl when she's down. Oh, your mom died? And you haven't been working all year and have used up all your savings? Well how about I make you homeless during this most momentous of economic crises. You and your little dog, too. That's nice.